Apparently, Making Eye Contact Is a Big Mistake in a Lot of Countries
In the United States, there’s one specific gesture that’s deeply embedded in social interactions. From an early age, parents and teachers instruct children to look people in the eyes when speaking to them. Maintaining a steady gaze is considered proof that you are trustworthy and attentive. Even in formal settings, people observe who maintains eye contact. A colleague who avoids eye contact for too long might be perceived as distracted or even dishonest.
Many Western countries share this understanding. In Germany, France, the United Kingdom, and Australia, making eye contact during a conversation is viewed as essential for honest communication. Public speakers are often taught to scan their audience. Friends chatting casually will naturally meet each other’s eyes.
However, in many other countries, that same habit can come across as confrontational, disrespectful, or even aggressive. Here’s how.
Unexpected Interpretations Abroad
Image via Unsplash/Andriyko Podilnyk
If you use excessive eye contact in a different cultural setting, the atmosphere of the room can change instantly. In Japan, for instance, prolonged eye contact is often considered too direct or even aggressive. Children are taught early on to direct their gaze slightly below the other person’s eyes. Looking directly into someone’s eyes for an extended period can be perceived as a challenge rather than a sign of respect.
In China, the same behavior might suggest confrontation, whereas in South Korea, making direct eye contact with someone older or in a position of authority is seen as disrespectful, not as a sign of attentiveness.
For Middle Eastern countries, eye contact carries its own complex meanings. A man speaking with another man in a professional setting might maintain eye contact without any issue. However, in many public spaces, extended eye contact with someone of the opposite gender can be considered intrusive or inappropriate.
These interpretations are deeply rooted in local customs and historical practices. Travelers often do not recognize these subtle cues until they have already performed the gesture and observed the unexpected reaction.
The Science Behind the Signal
The varying interpretations of eye contact are not arbitrary. Researchers have dedicated years to studying how people process and react to eye contact. One compelling example occurred at a university in England, where posters featuring watchful eyes were placed above bicycle racks. Without the addition of cameras or security guards, bicycle theft in those areas decreased by 62%. These images alone created a strong sense of being observed, powerful enough to alter behavior.
Another study compared the reactions of Finnish and Japanese participants. Both groups quickly noticed when someone made eye contact with them. However, Finnish participants described the faces they saw as open or neutral, while Japanese participants more frequently described those same faces as tense or less approachable. A single gaze conveyed two entirely different emotional meanings, determined not by the cultural perspective of the person receiving it.
Gestures That Change Across Borders
Eye contact is not the only common gesture that varies in meaning across different cultures. A hand raised in greeting can convey unintended messages in other regions. For example, a thumbs-up gesture, which signifies approval in some Western cultures, is considered rude in parts of the Middle East. Extending your open palm towards someone can also be an insult in Greece. Even simple nods and head shakes are not universally consistent.
A Small Habit With a Big Impact
The next time you hear someone say that eyes are windows to the soul, remember that those windows are framed differently depending on your cultural perspective. It’s a powerful reminder that even the smallest gestures are shaped by histories, traditions, and local expectations.