We’ve all made relationship mistakes. Dated that person who rarely called or talked over us or was needy to the point of smothering.
But most relationships — good or bad — follow similar patterns, and if you know what signs to spot, you’ll be able to find a good relationship that much quicker. Here are the five worst relationship red flags to help you find your match or determine who to kick to the curb (now!).
You’re Always Second Best
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A good relationship means both people are willing to compromise, period. If you’re the one doing all the work or making all the concessions, then you’re not in a respectful relationship.
In the same vein, a partner who makes fun of you or puts you down in the beginning of your relationship is a major red flag. This behavior is often a result of low self-esteem, and they’re doing this to make themselves feel better.
We hate to say it, but it likely won’t get better. You should move on and find someone who makes you feel special.
They’re Not Engaged
This doesn’t mean that they need to be “on” every time they see you. In fact, you’d want a partner who can be vulnerable and show you when they’re tired or upset about a personal matter.
What we mean is often more subtle. If they’re always on their phone or asking you to repeat yourself because they’re not listening, this means they’re not engaged. If they’re not interested in what you’re doing or the things that matter to you most, what does that say about sharing core values?
You’re Not Getting the Support You Need
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Your goals should be your partner’s goals, and vice versa. They should support you even if your dreams might be too ambitious.
It’s a bad sign if they poke fun at your goals and say you won’t be able to achieve them. A good partner will help you find ways to reach your dreams or offer constructive feedback on any doubts they might have.
In other words, if your partner tries to hold you back, run for the hills. It’s another sign of insecurity that’s coming from a very selfish place.
They Don’t Compliment You
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Your partner doesn’t have to (and honestly shouldn’t) like everything that you do. But there’s a huge difference between having a difference of opinion and never getting approval from your partner. If they don’t tell you that you look great or appreciate your cooking once in a while, that’s cause for concern.
Even the most confident people need reassurance and positive feedback from the people they love most. After all, it shows they’re loved and (again) supported.
Your Friends and Family Disapprove
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If you can’t even talk about your partner with friends or family without upsetting someone, you need to rethink your relationship. Talk to your friends and family about why they disapprove of your partner so much.
Yes, it might be jealousy, but that’s not going to be the case with every person in your life. More often than not it’s because they don’t like how your partner treats you. Red flag!
For more signs you’re in the wrong relationship, check out “24 Relationship Red Flags That Scream ‘Run.'”